Your mind, your friend, your power

You are NOT your mind
Even though you and your mind share the same space, you....are not your mind. The two are very different, there is YOU, the person that wants to love and be loved and there is your MIND, which is like a computer that holds information, plays it back and protects you to survive. 

The minds role 

Remember even though you are born with a powerful mind is not more powerful than you. Your minds purpose is to assist you, not control, overprotect or stop you from being happy. You mind has been given to you, to follow you. Your mind is not supposed to be the boss of you or your heart. That setup was only meant to be a temporary arrangement while you were young, it was not supposed to be carried over into our adulthood, and when it does it means we are not aware of these differences between the part the we think with (our mind) and the part we feel with (our heart) and the power of our free will. 

You and your mind have to become friends

Just as much as a pilot may know the autopilot exists, the autopilot does not know the pilot exists. You being the pilot and your mind being the autopilot have never really been introduced as friends.....that is, until now. It is true that at the beginning, there is a resistance to the free will action of change; this comes from your mind not knowing what's on the other side. It’s a good thing a mind has you to help it through all of those problems and unknown that seem scary.

Your mind needs you

Remember your mind is not your enemy, it is supposed to be your best friend however it does not even know you exist yet; it’s been created to help you not only in your childhood as the "big protector" but in your adult life as the "co-creator and helper”. The mind is very fast and smart, however it is not as wise as you, it often gets confused between a past hurt and a present moment. 

Teaching your mind - free will

So the question is, in times of stress, conflict or anxiety are you going use your free will to teach your mind what you want it to believe so it can assist you, or will you stand back and witness your mind freeze, distract or make you numb?  Will you let yourself be taken by your minds reflex of worry, panic and fear without your permission?

As protective and needed as this can be when we are young, when this happens as adults the outcome is disastrous. An undirected mind working with a protective survival reflex will steal away valuable time, health, opportunity, peace and eventually your life. 

Now you cannot blame your mind for taking and giving your body the "I am in trouble" message, if you did not bother to speak up and take charge by letting it know that you’re okay in that moment. Your mind being link to your body can be very convincing as it increases your heart rate, your breathing, makes your hands start to sweat and your stomach ache. All these are signs that your mind is thinking “danger danger”, all of these sign also signal a time for you to act. You are not a witness to your mind, you are its leader and it needs you.

Leading and using your mind – the action of free will

The only thing to do is an action, first you have to decide, you have to talk and tell your mind what's really happening.......are you really in danger or has your mind got it wrong? Is the past going to recreate itself or is the present going to be different? If you do not communicate with your mind and merely witness it, your wonderful well-meaning pal the mind, can only replay and overlay all of your past hurts and experiences onto each present moment. If not redirected by you it will shut you down; distract and avoid.  This is all out of the survival reflex that attempts to protect you from any past hurts from happening again. 

In order to take control, your mind needs you to introduce yourself; your mind needs you to lead and give it new and accurate information. Your mind looks to you for guidance, your mind looks to you for support, nurturing, patience and compassion. Your mind also needs you to learn how to trust without proof (minds tend not to trust very well), this by the way is called faith. Your mind needs you to create peace from the panic of the unknown, to find order in chaos, to create movement in fear and to know the difference between what is real and what is not.

Your mind is your friend

You and your mind have to become friends. You are going to be together for a long time, so the sooner the better. This introduction can be as simple as saying, “Mind, it’s okay, we are okay in this moment. Now go and find me some more positive thoughts to play with”. To reprogram the mind, you must know first understand awareness, (the differences and the roles of the mind and the heart), and accept the power of your free will. There are many ways we choose in this life. Inevitably, however, we are primed to use our free will at the beginning by being pushed into it by suffering. Later, with practice, we choose before we have to suffer.

This all starts with the first action of "free will"

So your first action of free will can be immediate, it can be used to accept that you are not your mind, the next is to be able to see your mind as an important part an amazing gift that once aimed and directed by you can be used to attract unlimited opportunities and experiences of love, peace and happiness....‪​......when you talk your mind is programmed to listen, it must follow you, you are actually linked to its survival.

You decide your identity

You decide your identity

Unless one has consciously created or built a certain identity or character type, these traits are not the real person, in fact many times they are the direct opposite of the person. For example, she is so sweet but when she gets triggered she gets so angry, he is so nice but when he drinks he becomes abusive. Which one is real, usually the real person is trapped in the protective identities and reflexes (shutting down, anger). Learning and evolving your identity does not change the core of the person, it merely removes the pieces that are not them.

This can be the first day of your new life, or another day of the life you have always had. You have the power to decide what parts of you, you like and what personalities or identities you want to change. it may sound too good to be true, but every quality, behavior or personality can be modified and updated as needed by you. 

The Stagnant to Dynamic

Identities, personalities and the person are meant to be dynamic, you have the power to update, adapt and use multiple pieces of identities several times a day, they are all meant to be modifiable. You can mix and match, merge, and adapt them as you wish based on the situation and the experiences you want. Some will act as a foundation for others to build on, and others you will change as the situation dictates. Identities are like clothes or music, do you just wear one color or style every day in every environment or situation, do you listen to just one song over and over or do you listen to multiple songs or all types of music?  

The challenge and resistance to be you

Why is it so challenging to break from our core beliefs? Is it due to the strong survival effect our mind has on controlling our taught identity to keep us safe. At the beginning the mind convinces us to stay the same; the mind gives us the false message that the uncomfortable pain of change and the unknown is more dangerous than the current suffering of doing the same familiar and safe reflex. This is known as resistance to change and its mere presence is what actually tells us we are at the door to positve change.

Suffering is felt when you are just revolving in one spot and you need to move, it is the signal to use your free will to choose, move, act and evolve. Resistance to change is felt when you are about to move and it is no more than the mind's perceived safest action to stay in control, but more significant is the meaning behind the sensation of this point of resistance. This marks a point of change, a leap into yourself and signals that you are moving correctly.

You get to create and teach your own mind the internal lines you want to live by, which are very different that the lines the mind sets. Our mind is so focused on protection that it gets stuck on hanging onto the “always staying the same and safe” identity for survival. This causes us to get lost in a time warp of responsibilities and rules with any evolution of the soul being always pushed through by loss time, love or health. This numbzone pattern takes us so far off what makes us happy that we need some kind of intense awakening (heart attack, loss, relationship breakup) to reset us.

The efficient alternative is to just accept our gift of free will and choose. This gift of free will is yours to use, by seeing the contrasts of life instead of judgment. You do not need free will to be in a reflex or to revolve in the same spot. 

It is the awakening to this great gift we call life and our power. Inside every one of us is a force that connects us to life, love, happiness and purpose. Choosing to believe in this force allows you to create your own identity, making every day dynamic and creative. You get to inspire others around you without any effort and your health, happiness and life experiences are maximized.

The Balanced Balance Wheel

The Balanced Balance Wheel - The Happiness Bank 

Making the priority list - Many of us have different core beliefs, identities and values that are not truly ours. This means many of us are living with a internal responsibility or group of rules that have not been made by us, in other words we have not consciously out of free will decided them. This creates anxiety, stress and disease. To check your current priority list; from 1 to 8, with number 1 being the most important or valuable to you list each section. For instance is you listed money as number one and romance as number 5, do not be surprised if you create more money than love. The order may need to be changed and re-adjust based on what you currently want in your life.

How much happiness do I have - moving from the center, color or fill in each section with the level of contentment or happiness in each section. For instance if you are happy or content with your job 50%, then fill it in halfway, even if you did not have a job at the time but are content 50% with the work or effort you are putting into finding one, then you would still fill it in halfway.

Filling the Wheel - Once all completed, then stand back and see what areas of your life need to be improved or focused on. Next list or come up with 4-5 ways (goals) of increasing every aspect of the balance wheel.